Advertising Yourself

As I was driving into work, I noticed that the Honda in front of me had some writing on the rear window, much like if the driver was newly married or freshly graduated. As I got closer, I was able to read the white shoe polish writing: I WAS DUMPED + I'M AVAILABLE.

I chuckled for a moment and thought "Good for you. You go girl!" Ok, I didn't think that last part... but I'm sure other people did. Then I thought about things a little more. At this point, every unshaven moron in a smelly T-shirt will be honking at this woman. Is that going to make her feel better? Stinky drunks on the highway making disgusting sexual advances towards her?

What chance would someone similiar to myself have? She's just been asked to show her boobs by a Budweiser trucker, and along comes Joe Everyman to give a thumbs up and see if she's seriously looking. Do you really think she's going to entertain that conversation? Hell no. "Get away from me creep" is most likely the response.

Unless you're Mr. Beefy and speak in a psuedo-Spanish accent then you have no chance. Or maybe if you're a worthless pothead who lives with your parents... yeah you have a shot with Ms. Look At Me too. Pretty much any scumbag, you have a clear shot with this lady. So I guess her plan worked. Way to go. Enjoy your new loser boyfriend who I'm sure is soooooooooooooo much better than the genius who dumped you. Don't trade up or anything... that would be too smart.

Ok, I've veered off the original intent here.  I'm tired.  Sue me.